Quarrels in a Relationship – The Most Common Patterns of Quarrels

Even when we’re madly in love with each other, Quarrels in a Relationship life will create situations where a relationship is put to the test. Reactions to quarrels best verify whether the couple can communicate or whether they still need to refine the way of communication, TripTogether.com especially the one that is accompanied by strong emotions.
How to get through the storm without hurting yourself unnecessarily? The most common patterns of quarrels were developed by John Gray. He called them the principle of 4 u.

1) STRIKE – Quarrels in a Relationship

During a quarrel, we often utter words that we regret very much. Negative emotions make us out of control of our words and our dialogue is like a fight. We raise our voice, scream. Such behavior and words remain in the subconscious for a long time, which weakens the partners’ trust towards each other. The relationship loses closeness and mutual respect.


it is a scheme opposite to the hit, but equally harmful. Escaping is all about avoiding conversation, pretending the problem doesn’t exist. Hoping that omitting it will make it disappear on its own. Unfortunately, bypassing a confrontation will not make the problem disappear. On the contrary – the suffocated emotions usually come back in a strengthened form. Of course, it is hard to remember in an argument, but any problem or understatement can be explained calmly.

3) PASSING – Quarrels in a Relationship

This is one form of escape, we pretend there is no problem. We put on masks that everything is fine, even though we feel internally that we are suffering. This is typical behavior for little courageous people who are afraid to talk about their feelings.


“its all my fault”. Taking all the blame on yourself, for the sake of peace, when we know that the fault is on both sides is not a good solution. However, for some reason (usually it is related to the fear of losing another person) we take the blame. It’s a short-term solution ..

Relationships are needed. Talking about your emotions, including the bad ones, and sharing them with your partner can make your relationship stronger. However, it is worth choosing the right moment for the interview and try to control your emotions.

How can we make us feel fully satisfied with our lives? Can you change your life to feel it? The founder of positive psychology, Martin Seligman, has no doubts Quarrels in a Relationship. TripTogether It is possible. Seligman, a guru of American psychology, author of many textbooks and lecturer at the University of Pennsylvania, also verified his ideas over the years to come to surprising conclusions. In fact, there are a few simple criteria to be satisfied in order to feel satisfied.

Quarrels in a Relationship - The Most Common Patterns of Quarrels

Happiness The Fullness of  life – Quarrels in a Relationship

Only if we meet five different conditions that result from it, will we be able to speak of full satisfaction with our life, which we can also call happiness. According to Seligman, Quarrels in a Relationship well-being consists of five independent and measurable elements. These are: positive emotions, absorption, relationships with others, meaning and achievements. But well-being cannot just come from something that exists only in our head. To experience the REAL FULL LIFE, its ingredients must be real and measurable.

Among the positive emotions, Seligman mentions, among others a sense of happiness, satisfaction, but also optimism, good self-esteem, vitality and self-determination. Without these qualities, it will be difficult to talk about building your life as full and fulfilled. It is also impossible to live alone, because man is a social being. Building positive relationships with other people is the basis of our satisfaction ..

But positive relationships with others are not artificial contacts or the number of friends on Facebook. It is building REAL relationships with other people, not based on “deals” or falsehood. Having a positive relationship with others is having friends that REALLY care about YOU, Quarrels in a Relationship no matter what your current social status or material position may be. If you are a successful person, make an examination of conscience quickly. Think how many of the people around you would stay with you if you suddenly lost your position or property? If you have such people, cultivate only those acquaintances and friendships. The others are worth nothing.

Sense of SENSE is No less Important. – Quarrels in a Relationship

You will not achieve well-being if you do not feel that what you are doing makes more sense and serves something. I personally know women who “do not lack bird’s milk” and yet are frustrated and nervous. As it turns out, having only money and being able to spend it almost unlimitedly, although life makes it easier, does not contribute to full satisfaction. What is more, people who do not do anything in life that they consider to be meaningful (and only providing themselves with pleasure or shopping is definitely not part of it), usually have quite low self-esteem, and thus complexes . For this reason, in order to find a deeper meaning in life and not to get rich solely for the sake of riches, many financial crooks sponsor various types of charity.

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The feeling of being absorbed is the possession of such passions, the realization of which time ceases to exist. It does not matter whether it will be a scientific activity, sports, embroidery, cooking – if there is something in your life that, firstly, requires effort and constant improvement in a given field, and, secondly, can absorb you completely, it is a sign that you are on your way.

Last but not least, the achievements. Without them, your life cannot be fulfilled either. Of course, they can be related on various levels, translate into finances, professional career, activities in non-profit organizations – but they must be real. They can even be successes in amateur sport or participation and potential victories in a competition for the most beautifully flowered balcony – we set the bar where we have a chance for real success – but they must be your own!

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